Monday, February 27, 2012

Birthday Parties! My How They have grown

When I was young, my parents idea of a birthday party for us was to have family over to celebrate.We would have so much fun laughing and opening up our presents that each one of our family members would bring for us. We were allowed to have a friend come over for the party and when we were a bit older, that friend could spend the night. Now, I do remember a couple of years that I would have a slumber party for my birthday. That said, I had a blast. I remember my birthday being something I could not wait for. Then and even now, looking back on them, I never remember thinking it was not enough or what was going to top this one next year.

Now, in the present day, with my kids birthdays were becoming a monster. My first 2 children are 11 months apart. We would join their birthday parties together for the first 5 years since their birthdays were only 2 weeks apart, with the exception of the first birthday parties. From their first birthday parties on, I was thinking what was going to top this party for next year. Was I crazy? Family and friends, our friends and theirs. Food, oh the food. I spent days cooking and cleaning and preparing for the big event.

Our first joint birthday party was rather simple, with the exception of the 30 people or so we had at our house. There was cake and apps, but as for other activities the kids were outside playing in the yard with all the toys. Everyone seemed to have a good time including the birthdays kids!

The next year, the kids were turning 3 and 4. We had to up the anti! It was about 30 to 40 people packed into my house. The apps and cake turned into dinner food and a bigger cake. Outside play turned into organized chaos with games to play. and we had prizes and goodie bags! The kids had a good time, and so did the birthday kids. They were a little whiny and when opening our presents there were tears. I would sit back and think to myself, "Do they have any idea what I just did for them? Why were they acting like this? It seems so rude that they are crying and cranky when all these people are here to enjoy this day with them." With the exception of being tired and a little cranky, I made it through. But, again, I am sitting there later in the evening thinking what next years party would be!

Then came our final birthday party even though we did not know it yet. Here we were, turning 4 and 5 years old. This was going to be the best party ever, or at least until next year! So, this year our party size grew. We had more friends from preschool which in turn meant more parents at the party. Each one of the kids had about 15 kids in their class. So, that is 30 kids right there! Each with at least 1 adult and maybe a sibling. Plus our family and our friends and of course the kids friends that were not in their classes. The cooking had to start a week in advance. The cake was started days in advance as  this one was bigger than the last and it had cupcakes for the kids. Decorated with handmade jungle animal chocolate lollipops and palm trees. It was a lot of work. I sat up in my kitchen at night working on the things. I was crying in my kitchen thinking I was never going to be ready for this party. I had so much to do. All the cleaning I had done, I had to do again the day of the party as I had made huge messes with the food prep. It was overwhelming to say the least! I was yelling at my kids and yelling at my husband. Then feeling  guilty for yelling, I would cry.

The party went off great. The kids played games, until the traveling zoo came to the house. We all went downstairs to see, pet, and learn about the animals. My kids got to hold them, even the alligator! It was amazing. There were tears again opening the presents and it took hours to open them. With that many kids there, there were an awful lot of gifts. The kids would get distracted and and then got to a point that they were not even interested in opening them, but we got through it.

At the end of the party when everyone left I got to reflect on the day. As I stood in the doorway starting at the hours of clean up I had in front of me I thought to myself "I cannot top this next year!" I was exhausted, worn out, and emotionally drained.

Was it worth seeing my kids faces holding the animals and blowing out the candles, of course it was. But, would they have been any less happy if it was a birthday party with their family and a friend. Again, I was happy and don't think I missed out on anything when it was my birthday.

I guess, I was doing the parties more as a selfish reason. I think I was trying to out do not only the last party, but other peoples parties. I wanted it to be bigger and better and to have that feeling of people saying wow!

I really reevaluated after the "Zoo party". Every year from then on out, my kids would get money for their birthday. They would pick either myself or my husband to go shopping with. They get to pick out whatever they want at the store. We still have a birthday dinner and we will have birthday cake. We even have some family over to share in the birthday excitement. And you know what, they still have an awesome day!

Melanie~